An asteroid will probably not hit Earth on Christmas Eve.
Or will it? I’m just asking questions here!
The first Star Wars movie came out in 1977. A new hope; a retitled IV. You know who else became a IV?
Malcolm IV, King of Scotland. He was a boy king. Interested in knighthood and warfare, and deep into mystical faith type stuff. Died in December of 1165. A new hope, indeed.
Malcolm was nicknamed “the Maiden”. I know I’ve called Luke Skywalker that a few times over the years.
A new Star Wars movie came out just in time for Christmas this year. Spoiler – there was a light saber battle! Malcolm would have loved it.
Certainly, these events must have great meaning.
This ChristGeddonMas Holiday was, in fact, foretold in the Epic of Gilgamesh, the first words of which are “He who saw the Dark Side of the Moon.” I’m pretty sure about that. My copy is a bit smudged and the translation might be off, but you can trust that I wouldn’t lead you astray.
Then again, I might be making something out of nothing. Maybe not.
Best to hunker down in the bunker until 2016. If I’m wrong and the Empire doesn’t return to blow us all up, then it was probably a mathematical error and we will revisit this problem again next year. Or at the end of the next 19-year lunar cycle.
Either way, always remember, Hans shot first.